Photo via Julia
Today was rough, horrible, completely memorable in a not so great way. Today was one of those days where you are the fly and life is the car windshield; ugly, graphic and hard to clear away. I do have to admit that all the blame shouldn’t be placed on this single glorious day, but on all the recent days leading up to it.
Today’s awful, not so great day was a culmination of all of life’s recent pressures, coming together at a peak and them completely blowing up in my face. Today was the day that I needed a pair of boxing gloves just to make it through the work day and a day when I didn’t have enough energy to fight. Today was the day that the pressure of opening my online shop by the end of June became to much, and things needed to be reassessed. Today was the day that I was temporarily convinced I shouldn’t be a blogger because I’m boring, the stuff I write about is bland, I don’t have a “voice” and the content I put out there is just plain shit. Today was also the day that my to-do list exceeded what was physically possible to achieve, not today…maybe not in this lifetime. Last but not least, today was the day the laundry piled way too high, the living room rug became an award-winning collector of dog fur, the refrigerator became completely empty, and I still haven’t had a chance to get my butt to a salon an get my hair dyed. Yeah…that was today.
I’m feeling completely defeated and living on the edge of insanity is just not my cup of tea. I need to take a BIG deep yoga breath (maybe 5,000 would be good), take a little time for me, and come up with a game plan to make life a little more manageable. I’m not one to let life defeat me and when it makes a really great attempt, I make lists. Lots and lots of lists. (predictable) I brainstormed in a hot bath tub filled with aloe bubbles until my toes were embarrassingly wrinkly. Of course I cried…a lot, and I whined that there would never be a solution. After coming back down to reality I think I managed to come up with a 6-step plan. (or at least a start of something solid)
Step one is to eat something. Stat. Step two is to make lists (DUH) of things that are absolutely crucial. I’m talking about “What’s absolutely necessary to get done in the next 30 min?”, and work from there. Small baby steps are the way to go. Step three is to reach out to the people I’m closest to and bloggers who I value their opinions, and see if they have any insights about some of the things I’m struggling with. My hope is to gain perspective from doing this. Step four is to come up with a blogging schedule that will give me something to plan my weekly posts against. More structure and less flying by the seat of my pants kind of thing. Step five is to extend my shop launch deadline to be less concrete. Instead of it opening at the end of June, it will be opening “this summer”. This allows me to produce a product that I’m 100% invested in and completely passionate about. I’ll also be removing the lookbook from my immediate tasks to accomplish. The lookbook is a want and not a need at this point. Step six is one of the most important. It’s time to get inspired again. I’m talking uber inspired.
So that’s the plan, the immediate plan. Things may be adjusted as I work things out, but right now things are feeling a bit more manageable. By the end of this month, when I reach the beginning of my 25th year, I’ll be ready to take on anything that comes flying my way. Bring it on. Bring it on.
Post referring to Thursday, June 9th